


Little More Than A Memory

by lupinjoallen



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Death, M/M, Mourning, Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-14
Updated: 2018-10-14
Packaged: 2019-08-01 18:10:45
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,542
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16289372
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lupinjoallen/pseuds/lupinjoallen
Summary: Castiel makes a choice to visit Y/N, back when he was still alive.





	Little More Than A Memory

Hundreds of thousands of years have passed, and yet, Castiel found himself still astonished by life itself. He watched over everything, every river that cut it’s way through the earth. Every mountain that cracked and burned the trees. Every life that had ever faded in and out.

He watched the humans as they wandered the streets, blissfully unaware of the last fifty years. Unaware of the celestial being that walked beside them. Closer to him still was a young nephilim. He looked no older than maybe fifteen. Yet, this creature was nearly a hundred now.

The nephilim looked to Castiel and asked, “Why do you look sad?”

The angel sighed, looking to him. “I’m going to be away for the next several hours. Please go back to the bunker, Jack.”

Jack sighed. “I hate the bunker...it feels more like a crypt.”

“I know,” The angel said simply. “But it is safe. And it will give me a place to find you once I’m back. Alright?” Jack nodded, making a face. “What is it?”

“You always get sad this time of year. What is so special about it?” Castiel stopped walking for a moment, lost in his thought. Jack frowned. “I’m sorry. Uh...Is it--”

“Yes. It is personal...Maybe I’ll tell you when I get back.” Jack simply nodded before the older angel vanished before his eyes. He sighed, lost in his own thought before returning to the bunker. He found the old photograph. There was himself and Castiel, with three young humans. Young at the time. Forty years prior, the brothers met their end. Castiel insisted on a Hunter’s Funeral. Jack never recalled him crying before, but he seemed to cry harder when a werewolf took the life of the third.

\--

“Hey, Cas,” Y/N greeted as he came into the library. He smiled sweetly. “Haven’t seen you in a while.”

Cas hummed, looking around the bunker. He sighed, seeing the new look to the shelves and the way the books still stayed in tact. He smiled softly as he saw Dean’s glass half-empty on the table. The ice was still settled in it.

“Dean went to get more alcohol. I think we drank the last of it last night.”

Cas smiled. “He should know better than to drink and drive,” He chided softly. “What about Sam?”

“Some foreign film in town,” Y/N chuckled. “He’s been obsessed lately.”

“Nothing wrong with indulgence,” Cas said fondly as he turned to look to Y/N. He saw the worry on his face and asked, “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing.” Cas gave him a look. Y/N sighed. “You seem...different.” Cas gulped. Y/N had always been intuitive to his feelings. “I’m worried about you.”

Cas watched him for a moment before crossing the floor to him. He gently cupped his face, feeling his Grace buzz with the thrill of being by him. He finally smiled and said, “I’ve missed you.”

Y/N watched him for a moment and smiled. “I missed you too, Castiel. Can I have a kiss?”

Cas smiled and kissed him sweetly. He felt his energy spark to greater heights and held him against him. He moaned softly as he tasted Y/N’s mouth for the first time in several decades. He felt himself shudder as he kissed him more deeply, making the young human moan before him. Cas pulled away, making Y/N whine softly. He blushed at that sound. Before he could stop himself, Cas lifted Y/N up and carried him to their room.

The memories flooded back to him. From the first kiss, to the drunken nights Y/N spent cuddling him and playing with him wings, to the way Y/N clung to him when they watched scary movies, to the last time he was alive and under him. The last night before the werewolf hunt.

Cas flinched when Y/N’s hand gently cupped his face. “Castiel?” He asked worriedly. “You’re crying. What’s wrong?”

Cas watched Y/N before kissing him again. “I love you, Y/N. I really don’t say it enough,” He said softly.

Y/N smiled against his lips and sighed. “You better tell me what’s going on,” He said.

“Maybe later,” He amended as he laid him on the bed. He kissed Y/N’s neck gently, making the man sigh in pleasure. “Right now, I need to prove something.”

“What’s that?”

“That I can make you scream for me still.”

Y/N giggled and kissed him as Cas waved his hand, stripping them completely. Y/N shivered and pressed into him instinctively, his body seeking warmth in the sudden chill. Cas rubbed his hands over Y/N’s body gently, studying every inch of him. He bent his head and kissed at the many scars that appeared on his body over the years. He felt his human shuddering and squirming from the affection.

Castiel couldn’t help but smile. Y/N had always been easily flustered by affection. He blamed it on being a hunter. Y/N was never used to affection. It was when he’d met the brothers that he learned to allow people in. Castiel was the only one who could truly feel everything Y/N had.

Y/N watched Cas kissing over his heart gently, as if terrified. “Castiel?” He asked softly. The angel simply laid his ear over his heart, listening to the way it beat. He smiled. “Not going anywhere. Remember?”

Cas let out a shaky breath and nodded. “I know. I often grow afraid though,” He admitted. He moved up his body, settling himself between his legs. “I love you so much. I don’t ever want to lose you.”

Y/N watched him and cupped his face. “Unless you can find a way to make me immortal, I don’t think you can avoid it,” He said honestly. He brushed the black hair back, staring into those sorrowful blue eyes. “There’s gonna be a day you’ll be guiding me to Heaven. You know that, right?”

Cas gulped, remembering the day all too clearly. He nodded and kissed Y/N’s palm. “I know...I just don’t want it happening anytime soon.”

Y/N smiled. “Then kiss me, my angel. Kiss me and make us both forget those thoughts. Okay?”

Cas smiled and kissed him, pulling his legs around his waist. He used his Grace to work Y/N open, watching the way he writhed and moaned under him before slowly sliding into him. Y/N cried out in pleasure, clinging to him.

The angel moaned, holding him close as he kissed his neck. He slowly began to move. The human rocked against him, kissing away the tears that fell. He never would get his answer, and he knew that. He knew the angel would never tell him why he was crying. Instead, he held the angel close, rocking against him gently as he took in his scent.

It was something he had memorized, yet it was somehow different in that moment. He briefly pondered it, but the thought faded to the back of his mind just as quickly as the angel began to stroke his cock as he kept thrusting into him.

He cried out the angel’s name as they both reached their orgasm. The glow lasted for what felt like ages to him. To the angel, it was only a heartbeat.

Castiel moved and kissed him gently, enjoying the shaky breath against his lips and the shy touch along his skin. He smiled and kissed his head as he carefully pulled out. Y/N held onto him, cuddling against him. The angel hummed and pulled the blanket over them both.

“You’ve been awake for too long,” He noted, rubbing his thumb gently over the bags under his eyes.

Y/N sighed. “Yeah. I can’t calm down,” He admitted. “With Lucifer’s son here...Jack is a great kid. I worry about him.”

Castiel smiled and kissed his forehead. “He’ll be just fine. He’ll pull through everything and more,” He promised.

Y/N smiled and kissed his nose before snuggling into him. “You know just what to--” He yawned and curled into him more. “--say…”

“And I say that you need sleep, my love.” He ran his hand through Y/N’s hair, using his Grace to make him sleep. Y/N was out like a light.

Castiel watched Y/N sleeping, allowing himself to enjoy the moment before dressing. He gulped thickly, trying to convince himself to stay. Instead, he flew through time, watching the bunker fade and become lifeless in a blink.

He turned back to the bed, seeing the dust on the folded sheets. His lip quivered and he sighed, a few stray tears falling.

“You were visiting Y/N,” A voice said behind him. Castiel turned, seeing Jack standing there. “I thought you might’ve been. Why is today so special? It’s not the anniversary of his death or birth so…”

Castiel smiled. “When I met him. It’s the anniversary of when I first laid eyes on him during the Apocalypse.” He chuckled wetly. “He was holding up a gun to me. He was flirting with me. He was the first to trust me.” He wiped his face. “I loved him dearly, Jack.”

Jack nodded. “I know.”


End file.
